I Dream of Tyra

I don’t often laugh out loud at things I see on TV. Occasionally I break into an audible chuckle but I’m sure like most people, TV doesn’t find me crumpled in fits of belly aching laughter with tears streaming down my face. Yesterday, I saw something that very nearly did do this to me though. It was so good I had to write about it. It came from the most unlikely place too: The Tyra Banks Show.

Tyra was doing a special on eating disorders. Yes I know, she’s SUCH a trail blazer when it comes to topic choice. Anyway, there on screen was a pretty girl sitting nervously in the hot seat, she was probably a size 14 at most. Essentially, she was normal and healthy looking- totally do-able even. I was a little intrigued as to how she could possibly claim to have any sort of eating disorder. I don’t remember her name, but for sake of ease (and kicks in general) I say we call her Cindy:

Tyra: (on stage and sporting her “serious woman’s business” expression) Now Cindy, you have a very different eating disorder...

Cindy: (nods earnestly) Yes Tyra, I do.

Tyra: Yes, Cindy, you (pauses for effect) ...are a sleep eater.

Oh Cindy! Your trials and tribulations are finally out in the open! How have you been living with yourself? Those nights of rising in the wee hours and cramming your face with chocolates and ice-cream, those dark hours, those demons you’ve faced, it’s all out there now!

We were then showed footage of an allegedly sleeping Cindy wandering around the kitchen and gorging herself exclusively on any rubbish she could find. Concerned friends gave anecdotes of how they would wake in the night to hear Cindy banging cupboards and slamming fridge doors whenever they stayed over. Cindy even went so far as to have her grandpa (???) hide all the treats in the house, but her sleeping alter ego went crazy and made a ruckus in the kitchen when she was unable to find those treats she so desired.

The conversation continued:

Tyra: ...and how much weight have you gained?

Cindy: Probably about ten pounds over the years.

(For those of you who don’t know, that’s not even 5 kilos.)

Tyra: But Cindy, how did you know you were sleep eating?

Cindy: Well, I found wrappers and things in the morning, but mostly it was the chocolate smeared on my pillow.

The chocolate smeared on her pillow.